Given that there are thousands of thoughts swarming around our heads, how do we begin to think our own thoughts, derived from our own wisdom? For starters, begin to remove anything that fills your mind with extraneous information or entertainment that provides little to no value in your life.
Some habits that you may want to kick:
- Listening to music on your iPod everywhere you go.
Almost all music we listen to today is meant to entertain and distract us from what really matters. Are you listening to keep up with pop culture, to feel better about yourself, to drown out the noise, to feel included, or to run away from the world? Just observe your intentions, and see what makes sense for you, in order to get as much ‘you time’ as you need. - Reading the news, unless necessary for your livelihood or personal growth. Several years ago, I had visited the picturesque state of Kashmir in northern India, which was also the center for quite a bit of terrorist-related violence. What struck me was that no one read the news, even when there had been an attack on a bus, the day before. When I asked a local, he said, “What’s the use? The news won’t change anything, plus we’re just living for the day!” It’s a truth that I’ve found resonant with my emotional and mental well-being, and the ability to have enough time and space for things I can control. I remember something that Zen teacher Thich Nhat Hanh had once said – that he doesn’t find out about the news, until someone tells him. It’s true – if it’s important, you will find out!
- Reading other magazines and books, or watching TV shows that are distracting. Again, the idea here is to free up your time for grounding and contemplation – as much as you can let go of entertainment that takes you away from ‘you’, the better.
- Spending time with friends or family who are negative or self-involved. This sounds difficult to do, but it’s important during your grounding stage (and perhaps as you continue in your self-awareness journey). Do you have friends that you feel take away your energy, to the point of feeling depleted after being with them? Or do you hang out with people just to kick the tires, share your misery or just distract yourself from what really matters? Have compassion for yourself, and tell yourself that ‘it’s okay to not spend time with people that don’t nourish me’.
- Keeping your phone near you at all times. As much as we’re in a technologically advanced world, there is still etiquette for putting your phone away as much as possible. I have noticed people keeping their phones in the middle of a table, or even next to their mats in yoga class. Do you reach for your phone whenever you’re free, to call people or check your e-mail? Try to parcel out time during the day to do these activities in chunks. Observe how keeping ‘quiet’ time for certain parts of the day actually improves your productivity, while giving you back more quality time!
Easy next step: List things that distract you from having time to yourself, deplete you, or from focusing on what really matters –stop doing them, one by one, but without feeling like you are depriving yourself of course!
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